


How did all my dreams turn to nightmares?

by gender_idontknowher



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Homesick Lance (Voltron), Hunk & Lance (Voltron) Friendship, Hunk (Voltron) is a Good Friend, Hunk being a good friend™, Hurt/Comfort, I made allura a bad person and i'm suffering, Kinda, Langst, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-17
Updated: 2018-01-17
Packaged: 2019-03-06 02:50:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,137
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13401861
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gender_idontknowher/pseuds/gender_idontknowher
Summary: Just a sad thing my friend asked for. Sorry. The song I reference in here is Home by Machine Gun Kelly, X Ambassadors, and Bebe Rexha. Give it a listen. It's so good! And sad...





	How did all my dreams turn to nightmares?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [buleemozar](https://archiveofourown.org/users/buleemozar/gifts).



**How did all my dreams turn to nightmares?**

Lance rubbed his eyes, trying his hardest to not yawn. He was so tired, even in important situations like this. Allura was talking about their next mission, and she had already yelled at him for being spacey. All anyone did these days was yell at him. He couldn’t do anything right, and it was visibly affecting the team. He had tried to shut up the voices telling him he wasn’t good enough to be a paladin of Voltron, but how can he shut them up when they were coming from the outside? 

 

_ Home, a place where I can go, to take this off my shoulders, someone take me home.  _

 

Lance’s thoughts continued to spiral. He was completely worthless to the team, nobody even needed him. Now that they had Matt, Pidge didn’t need him as a brother figure anymore, and that hurt so much. Allura thought he was just a waste of space, pissed that he flirted as a reflex. Keith and Shiro were always too wrapped up in each other to care. Coran was always busy fixing the ship, sending Lance away as politely as possible. He figured that Coran was dealing with his own problems, and that was okay. He could respect that. 

 

He was brought out of his mind by Allura yelling at him. 

 

“Lance! Can’t you focus for once and just listen to me! I’m so sick and tired of you never taking anything seriously! This is not how a paladin acts!” She continued to shout, hurling more insults at him. His eyes started to water, and suddenly all the noise stopped, the only noise was his heart pounding and the blood rushing in his ears. He tried to breathe in, but his throat felt tight. He kept trying to inhale, but he couldn’t pull in any air. He started to panic, black creeping into the edges of his vision. He felt hands on him, holding him close, rubbing soothing circles into his back. 

 

“Lance, it’s alright. You’re alright. I’m here. You’re safe. Shhh… Just breath with me, okay? Shhh…. It’s okay buddy, you got this.” Hunk’s soothing voice sounded far away, but Lance focused on it as much as he could. He tried to breath in, and he found that his throat had loosened up, his chest felt less tight. He whimpered and gulped in lungfulls of air. Hunk rubbed his back gently, rocking him lightly in his arms. 

 

“What just happened?” Allura’s sharp voice cut through the silence of the room, all eyes on Lance. “Lance, if that was a way to avoid this conversation, it won’t work on m-”

 

“ALLURA! Just stop it!” Hunk cut Allura off angrily, which was a rare thing for the yellow paladin, who was always soft spoken and kind. “Just leave him alone. That is called a panic attack. Lance gets them sometimes, especially when he’s stressed or something like that. Please just leave him alone for a while.” Hunk picked Lance up, noticing how light the boy had become. Lance was always thin and light, but he didn’t even grunt when he lifted Lance from his chair. He shrugged it off and left the room, heading towards the observatory with Lance, stopping at his room to grab a blanket first. 

 

When he reached the observatory, he sat down on the ground, his grip on Lance never slipping even a bit. “Lance, can you talk yet? Are you okay?”

 

Lance looked up at Hunk, turning embarrased quickly. “Sorry man. Didn’t mean to freak everyone out. Are they mad? Oh god, Allura! She’s gonna be so pissed!” Lance struggled to sit up, obviously trying to run back to apologize to Allura, but Hunk was having none of it.

 

“Lance, sit down and just take a break, okay? Allura isn’t mad. It’s not your fault. What happened though?” He placed Lance next to him, offering him the blanket which he took gratefully and wrapped around himself. 

 

“I’ve just been feeling so useless, and I was thinking about it, and then Allura started yelling at me about all the things i’m insecure about, and it hit me harder than I thought.” Lance brought his knees into his chest, looking impossibly smaller.

 

“Lance, why do you feel useless? You’re so important! I mean, hey, you’re the best friend a guy could ask for. You help everyone so much more than you think. I mean, I know for a fact that you’re the main reason Shiro and Keith got together. Remember? You saw their feelings for each other, you saw the way they were avoiding each other, and you locked them in Shiro’s room for an hour? Then you forgot about them on accident, and when you came back, they were, well, doing it? Yeah, i’ll never forget that. There are some things that you just can’t unhear.” 

 

_ All these miles, feet, inches, they can’t add up to the distance that I have been through, just to get to a place where even if there’s no closure, i’m still safe. _

Lance smiled at the memory, remembering how traumatized Pidge had been. 

 

“And then there’s that time that Pidge was working all hours trying to find her family, and you were the only one who could get her to go to bed. She screamed at you to leave her alone, but you didn’t stop, you just picked her up, threw her over your shoulder, even when she kicked you and bit your arms, you just kept walking until you got to her room, and then you sat on the bed and held her until she fell asleep. You’re pretty amazing, man.”

 

“I’m a fucking mess sometimes, and I just feel so tired. I’m so fucking tired of this, I just want to go home. I just… I just want to go home…” Tears are pouring down his face, and Hunk says nothing, but pulls him into a hug, patting Lance’s shaking shoulders.

 

_ I still ache from trying to keep pace, somebody give me a sign, i’m starting to lose face.  _

 

“I miss Earth too. I miss my moms, and I just want to be home, just so that they can hug me close and tell me that they love me. I miss pizza, and grocery stores. And ice cream. GOD I miss ice cream. The things we miss may be different, but I know that things are hard for you. I understand how you feel, Lance. I’d give anything to just… be home, you know? Just to have Zarkon be dead, anything. I’d give anything.” Hunk wipes his face, the memories becoming too much, finally breaking them both down. 

 

_ I found no cure for loneliness, I found no cure for the sickness, nothing here feels like home, crowded streets but i’m all alone.   _

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you liked it! Leave a comment or a kudo if you want. (they feed my ego) ;)


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